Bribes are necessary!

The issue of corruption and bribes has been discussed in detail on this site and perhaps beaten to death. I will not add my two cents here, for two reasons, one I am a gujju and I believe in taking Two Dollars rather than giiving two cents and two because I have nothing new to add or say that has not already been said. Instead I am going to present some scenarios.
Husband & Wife
Our friend Chalu Chaman started watching the news, one time his wife caught him chatting with some woman and revoked his internet rights, he had no other choice but to watch TV, initially he kept watching music videos and kept drooling at Item girls but soon his wife Bijli - gave him the current and poor guy was banned from watching movies, serials and especially music videos. He was not happy about that but like most men he was too afraid to speak against her, he did complain that TV was boring but she suggested he start watching the news and learning a thing or two about the world.
The whole Anna Hazare and the corruption issue was picking steam when he started watching news and that peeked his interest, he followed the news closely and after couple of days he made up a plan. All he could talk about was life without bribes and corruption and Bijli could notice that he was a changed man.
The next week was a big day in Bijli's life, it was her 40th Birthday, she had thrown a big surprise party for Chaman when he turned 40 a few months ago and she was really looking foward to a party followed by gifts and a vacation to some romantic place. Chaman had a knack of coming up with surprises and she couldn't wait to turn 40, although deep inside one part of her was not looking forward to crossing that threshold. She was afriad of getting old and being less desirable to her husband and other men.
The night before her birthday she went to bed at her normal time but waited until 12 AM knowing Chaman would start the celebration at midnight., the clock turned 12 but all she could hear was his snores. She got mad and fell asleep, oh well there is always tomorrow she said to herself. The next day came and went, all she got was a "Happy Birthday Darling" from Chaman, he teased "Since you turned 40 you should change your name from Bijli to Roshni, you are no longer a lightning but merely light". She ignored him and waited until 12 AM that night and when she still did not get her gifts she got mad.
"Saale Chaman I throw a big party for you and you don't even give me one gift?"
""That is because of my new resolution"
"What? To not gifts? To not make your loved ones feel appreciated?"
"To not give or take bribes"
"I am talking about me, your wife, how can you bribe your own wife?"
"Well if I give you something you will feel good about yourself, at the same time you will have different feelings for me, perhaps you will treat me better, perhaps you would cook my favorite meal, less nagging perhaps or even better perhaps a favor in bed?"
"Please!!! Buddhe youand your dirty thoughts are sleeping alone in the sofa starting today"
"I shall accept that, it is better to accept what you deserve that get what you don't deserve through deceit and bribes."
"A gift is not a bribe, it is a form of love, a show of appreciation"
"Anything given with an expectation of reward is a bribe. Anything given that changes the feelings, attitude and behavior of the receiver is a bribe. Hence no gift for you dear Bijli"
"Give me the gift, I will not change my behavior, I will keep nagging you, I will keep thinking you are an ass"
"Dear Wife you have enlightened me, before I used to be on Facebook and useless chat sites for hours and had no moral values, now thanks to you I am a changed man and charity begins at home so you are the first one to taste my no bribe lifestyle, now go to sleep darling"
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Bribes and Blogging
RQ - Reco Queen had one mission in life, to get all her blogs in the most commented and recommended section. She would send notes to everyone asking them to read her blogs.
MK _ Maska King preyed on women like RQ, in exchange of  nice comments and recommendations he would get their email address and friend them on Facebook and chat with them for hours.
One day he received a note from RQ "Dear CC
I have posted a love story, please read the story at your convenience and provide your valuable feedback."
Like our friend Chaman, Maska had a change of heart
"Dear RQ
Thank you for your email. I regret to inform you that I no longer wish to engage in this barter. I will read your blog but will refrain from posting comments or recommending it. The reason is simple, if I do that you will feel obligated to to so on my blog and to chat with me on Facebook. I want my blog to do well on its merit and I suggest that you too put trust in your blog and stop sending mails to other members. In fact I want you to start practicing this right away and to help you get started I am going to write a blog "An open letter to RQ's mail receipiant's" whre I will request all of them not to comment of recommend your blog.
I know at this moment this seems harsh but this is for your own good. If you create multiple ID's I will expose that as well. The hits, comments and recommendations will drop initially but this will push you to work harder on your writing, if you do the same to others they will stop communicating with you outside of this site, which in turn will give you more time to concentrate on your writing.  In the long run this will benefit you. I am sending an email to the site administrator asking them to change my handle from Maska King to Sacha King."
Do you think this will happen in real life? :-)